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"When I was five years old my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life, when I went to school they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I wrote down 'Happy' they told me I didn't understand the assignment, I told them, they didn't understand life" -John Lennon.
Hello I'm Crystal and I'm a professional human being.


if someone “fights like a girl” you should be absolutely terrified of them have ever seen a girl fight they’ll rip your fucking throat out with their hands while the guys are still doing that weird cobra posturing thing for five minutes 


Fact: Today (September 23rd) is bisexuality awareness day. Be aware of bisexuals. They are dangerous.


beauty is such a bullshit value point like lol some people think im ugly some people think im beautiful and none of these people are going to pay me for having to deal with their thoughts so why should i care and what makes people live under the impression i give a single echo of a fuck? god. this is a one-person show and i’m the main player. hecklers will be thrown the fuck out. 


I have like 277262 kisses saved up for you

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